The Messy Middle: Why Transitions Feel Harder Than They Look
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Welcome!
Are you between who you were and who you're becoming—and feeling like you're the only one struggling? What if the awkward, uncertain, "I have no idea what I'm doing" space isn't a sign you're failing, but proof that real transformation is happening?
In this episode of Dim to Daring, I'm getting honest about the messy middle—that uncomfortable season where you've left something behind but haven't quite arrived at what's next yet. From my own career pivot that left me fumbling between identities, to the Instagram illusion that makes us think everyone else's transitions are seamless, this is about embracing the goo and trusting the process even when nothing feels certain.
You'll discover why the hermit crab moment—exposed, vulnerable, soft between shells—is where growth actually happens, how to track subtle progress when everything feels uncertain, and why the discomfort of transformation is exactly what builds the person you're becoming.
This is your permission to stop apologizing for being in process and start trusting that the messy middle isn't a detour—it's the transformation itself.
In This Episode, You'll Discover:
Why seamless transitions are a myth (and what's really happening behind the "I'm so excited to share" posts)
The hermit crab analogy: Why being exposed and uncomfortable is a sign of growth, not weakness
My own messy middle: Trading my calculator for a microphone and fumbling between identities
The truth about feeling like an impostor during your transition (and why that's completely normal)
Why your old identity and new identity will overlap for a while—and that's not confusion, that's transition
How grief and excitement can coexist during change (and why that's proof that what you left mattered)
The Instagram illusion: What you don't see in the six months before the polished announcement
Why many of us never learned who we are outside our roles—and how to navigate that now
What the messy middle is actually teaching you: resilience, discernment, patience, and self-compassion
How to track subtle progress when everything feels uncertain (hint: showing up counts)
Why you haven't lost yourself—you've just lost one way of expressing yourself
A powerful reminder: Feeling unsettled doesn't mean you're failing; it means something is changing
✨ If you're in the middle of a career shift, empty nest, relationship change, or any life transition that feels harder than you expected, this episode is your reminder that you're not behind—you're right on time.
Timestamps:
[01:44] – The middle part nobody posts about on Instagram
[03:08] – My own messy middle: Trading my calculator for a microphone
[06:02] – The Instagram illusion vs. the real version of transitions
[08:00] – The truth about the messy middle (and why it's supposed to feel hard)
[11:00] – What the messy middle is teaching you
[12:17] – Practical strategies for navigating the in-between
[15:28] – Embrace the goo: You're not behind, you're becoming
Key Points:
The Messy Middle Is the Transformation — The uncomfortable space between who you were and who you're becoming isn't something to rush through—it's where real change happens
Seamless Transitions Are a Myth — What you see on Instagram is the finish line, not the miles in between filled with uncertainty, tears, and second-guessing
Grief and Gratitude Coexist — You can miss parts of your old life and still be excited about the new one—both things can be true at the same time
You're Not Lost, You're Between — Not being the old thing anymore, while not quite being the new thing yet, isn't confusion—it's exactly what transition looks like
Small Progress Counts — Speaking up in a meeting, reaching out for help, or simply showing up again today are all evidence that you're moving forward
Embrace the Goo — Like a caterpillar dissolving before becoming a butterfly, you're not broken or failing—you're transforming
Episode Summary:
In this episode, I share the truth about the messy middle—that awkward, uncertain space between who you were and who you're becoming. Drawing from my own career pivot and the Instagram illusion that makes transitions look seamless, I explore why the discomfort isn't a sign you're doing it wrong—it's proof you're doing it at all. You'll discover five practical strategies for navigating your messy middle and learn why being uncertain doesn't mean you're off track. Whether you're navigating a career change, empty nest, or any major life transition, this episode gives you permission to embrace the goo and trust that transformation is happening right now.
Links & Resources:
📲 Follow Wendy on Social Media:
Website: Wendy Rimmelspacher
Instagram: @wendy_rimmelspacher
Facebook: Wendy Sexton Rimmelspacher
LinkedIn: Wendy Rimmelspacher
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Remember:
Your messy middle isn't a mistake—it's the path.
You don't have to have it all figured out to be on the right path.
Feeling unsettled doesn't mean you're failing; it usually means something is changing.
The discomfort of being between shells is where growth happens—exposed, vulnerable, and becoming.
And you definitely don't need to wait for it to feel seamless to trust that you're exactly where you need to be.
Keep choosing her. Keep celebrating her—even in the mess. And keep becoming. 👠