Elevate Your Inner Circle: Embrace the Elephant in the Room

There is an elephant in the room and I HAVE to call it out.  🐘

But don’t worry; this will feel empowering; not embarrassing. 💫

But first, does everyone know what the idiom ‘the elephant in the room’ refers to?

It’s a difficult problem or issue that everyone is aware of but no one wants to discuss or acknowledge.  Ignoring it can hinder any solution that would reduce the elephant's power over our forward-moving and empowering pathway. 

Imagine this scenario: Picture a room filled with women who recognize your incredible talent and skill, the very qualities destined to propel you toward greatness. 💥

Yet, there's something we all know but don't openly discuss—the hesitance to break free from the safety of our comfort zones. It's ‘the elephant in the room’, the unspoken truth that lingers among us.

But here's the thing: We all sense it. We know deep down that you're meant to bloom, to step into your greatness. And when that moment finally arrives, when you boldly declare your decision to embrace your full potential, it won't come as a surprise. It'll be a celebration of your journey, a testament to the power within you.

Elephants can’t be ignored because of their enormous size.  That’s what makes the idiom so interesting.  In other words, everyone sees the elephant, of course, but nobody speaks up about it.  The conversations continue and everyone pretends the elephant isn’t there.  

From Idioms to Facts

As entertaining as it is to talk about ‘the elephant in the room’ a more important point worth making is that elephants are remarkable creatures, known for their intelligence and emotional depth. 

Here are some reasons why elephants are remarkable:

• Intelligence: Elephants are among the most intelligent animals on Earth. They have complex social structures, exhibit problem-solving abilities, and demonstrate remarkable memory skills. Elephants are capable of learning new tasks and behaviors, and they display a deep understanding of their surroundings.

• Social Bonds: Elephants are highly social animals that form strong bonds within their herds. These bonds are often lifelong and are based on intricate communication, empathy, and cooperation. Elephants show concern for the welfare of their family members and exhibit behaviors that reflect a deep emotional connection.

• Emotional Depth: Elephants are known for their emotional depth and capacity for empathy. They mourn their dead, display signs of grief, and show compassion towards injured or distressed individuals within their herd. Elephants have been observed comforting and supporting each other during times of distress, demonstrating a profound understanding of emotions.

Suffice it to say that we should be honored to be compared to an elephant, even when it is still in the room.

The Elephant Gift

For my birthday one year, one of my amazing friends gifted me a necklace with a small medallion that had an elephant engraved on it. 🎁 Along with the gift came the story about how female elephants protect one another during vulnerable moments.  It’s truly inspiring.  Have you heard of this phenomenon? 

My inspiring friend gave me a beautiful gift when she told me that I am like this, that I protect other women and empower them to be the person they strive to be.  It was a very touching gift.

The story of what female elephants do is inspiring and speaks volumes about the strength of their bonds.  

Picture this: when a female elephant is giving birth or injured, the other females form a protective circle around her, creating a shield against any potential harm. It's a powerful display of solidarity and support among these majestic creatures.

This phenomenon, known as the "elephant circle," is a testament to the deep connections female elephants share within their herds. Naturalists and photographers have captured this remarkable behavior, showcasing the unwavering loyalty and care these elephants demonstrate toward their fellow sisters.

Photographer David Yarrow's captivating image of an elephant circle captures the essence of this protective instinct, prompting reflections on the importance of supporting one another during times of vulnerability. Author and podcaster Jen Hatmaker beautifully articulated the significance of women rallying around each other, drawing parallels to the protective embrace of the elephant circle.

Recently, I discovered an article that delves into the heartwarming story of female elephants and their remarkable bonds. It's truly uplifting to witness such acts of compassion and solidarity among these incredible creatures. If you're curious to learn more about the elephant circle and its parallels to our own sisterhood, I highly recommend giving it a read. You can find the article HERE.

The Power of Your Tribe

You deserve to be surrounded by inspiring, motivational, and supportive friends who are trustworthy, and dependable and celebrate your achievements.

You are the average of the 5 people you are around the most. Who you are and who you will become can be predicted by those you spend the most time with and who are in your inner circle.  

Think about these 4-5 people with whom you spend the most time in your life.  Are you holding on too tightly to some friendships that don’t bring out the best version of you?  Do you pause with a feeling of dread when any of these 5 people text you or call you?

If this is happening to you, this is a sign that you need to freshen up your Inner Circle with people who have positive energy and inspire and support whatever your wildest dreams are for your future self.

This is what you can expect when you cultivate healthier friendships:

• Support and Encouragement

• Inspiration and Motivation

• Honesty and Constructive Feedback

• Shared Values and Goals

• Accountability and Growth

• Positive Influence and Energy

• Celebration of Successes

Support and Encouragement: 

When you have a strong inner circle of friends, you are provided unwavering support and encouragement during both good times and challenges. 

When I need encouragement to overcome self-doubt, I can reach out to one of my inner circle friends for a pep talk to lift me up, provide advice, and help me stay focused on my goals.  Your tribe of friends needs to be so reliable that you have no hesitations to call in help when it’s needed.

Inspiration and Motivation: 

Being surrounded by motivated and ambitious individuals who can inspire you to reach for your own goals and aspirations, makes the pathway to your journey so fulfilling. 

Some of my inner circle friends are seemingly fearless.  When I feel like there is a big mountain in front of me and I’m anxious about my next steps, I look no further than these women and ask myself, “What would they do”?  It calms me to picture one of these women who have fearlessly accomplished great things in their lives and it instills confidence in myself to keep going. Having some inspiring and motivating role models in our tribes is essential. Remember, you are also every bit of this for your circle of friends when they need inspiration.

Honesty and Constructive Feedback: 

There is nothing more necessary in your circle of friends than the importance of honest communication within your inner circle. 

Constructive feedback from trusted friends can help you grow and improve in both personal and professional aspects of your life.  Being vulnerable and authentic is key to the building blocks for a healthy tribe of friends.  The more you trust each other to be kind and honest with feedback, the deeper your relationships will be.

Shared Values and Goals: 

Surrounding yourself with individuals who share similar values and goals builds an amazing support circle for growth.  Chances are that you each have different aspects and strengths to share to add value for others.   

When you align yourself with like-minded friends, you will create a sense of unity and purpose within your inner circle.  Remember that growth is an endless cycle that constantly readjusts.  Just as you feel you have reached an understanding of one aspect of your goal, something changes and you are in a learning mode, once again.  Be ready to be the learner, the teacher, and the coach for your tribe of friends at different phases of your friendships.

Accountability and Growth: 

Accountability plays a crucial role in personal growth and development. When you declare your goals verbally to your healthy inner circle of friends, they will check on you and ask how they can help you reach your goals.  And you will reciprocate for each of them with their goals.  This is called accountability.

For instance, one of my friends and I joined this journey of blogging together.  We continually check on each other’s progress and share new ideas and strategies.  We even joined a writer’s accountability group together called Writer’s Room with Natty. Interested in joining? Click on the link!

Positive Influence and Energy:

Positive energy and attitudes within your inner circle are key to the health of your tribe.  If somebody is negative towards others and their goals, it’s time to have a heart-to-heart talk and determine if it is healthy for you to continue spending valuable time with this person.  Surround yourself with uplifting and optimistic friends who can improve your mood, boost your confidence, and enhance your overall well-being.

Remember that we all have those ‘down’ moments when we need an attitude adjustment and a pep talk.  As long as nobody has a draining pattern of pulling everybody down in the circle and it is occasional ‘normal’ needs to be uplifted, you most likely have a healthy group.  Remind yourself to be the positive energy for others and look for friends who operate in this same positive manner.

Celebration of Successes: 

While pursuing our goals and visions, it’s easy to overlook the importance of celebrating our successes and milestones.  Yet, taking the time to revel in our achievements is crucial for our well-being and motivation.

When we reach a goal or accomplish something significant, take time to pause, reflect, and relish in the satisfaction of our hard work paying off.  Celebrating our successes allows us to acknowledge our growth, resilience, and determination.

When we share these moments of success with our inner circle, we amplify our joy and fulfillment.  They've been our pillars of support, cheering us on through challenges and setbacks. Including them in our celebrations not only strengthens our bonds but also recognizes their invaluable role in our journey.

So, as you progress towards your aspirations, remember to pause and celebrate the milestones along the way. Embrace the joy of achievement, and share it with those who have stood by you through thick and thin. Together, celebrate the victories that propel you forward on your path to greatness.  

And remember - celebrate all the successes that your friends have achieved in the same manner. To have a good friend is to be a good friend!

Be Thankful For the Elephant in the Room

This is the first of four blogs on the value of your Inner Circle of Friends.  In this blog, I hope you had a tug on your heart to appreciate the elephant in the room and to learn to call it out so somebody can move forward in their life.  We also learned that to be ‘like’ a female elephant is to have great solidarity, support, and protection from within our tribe of friends. 

Need help with your inner circle of friends so that you can rediscover your inner spark and live the life you want? I’ve got you!

To get the help you need to cultivate your positive, growth-minded friendships, connect with me here to learn about my coaching:  COACHING WITH WENDY   

Make this the year you own your commitments and transform beyond your fear!